Luigi's Mansion
Written by Metal Mario

Author's Note:
Luigi's Mansion, the flagship title for Gamecube, seems to have a pretty simple story. Mario has been mysteriously trapped inside of a haunted mansion that Luigi has won in a contest. Using a hi-tech vaccuum cleaner, Luigi must wander through the mansion, capturing ghosts in a tireless effort to rescue his older brother and confront the ultimate troublemaker. Sounds a bit predictable, right? But what if there was more to the story? Nintendo certainly left a lot of plot holes, leaving us to wonder how and why the Mario brothers were lured into this trap. This story's purpose is to re-tell the legend of Luigi's Mansion in depth, and by the time you've reached the end, you'll understand the full implications of the whole haunted affair. Enjoy.

Table of Contents

A Crumbling House Mail A Run-In with Old Foes Preparation Fall of the Kings Painting Restoration

"Okay, turn that washer a tad to the right," said Mario, carefully examining the situation. Luigi did as Mario requested. He was rewarded with a gusher of dirty water exploding in his face. "Turn it off!" exclaimed Luigi. "I'm getting soaked here! Turn it off!" Mario hastily turned the faucet to the left, halting the flow of water. Luigi frowned and wiped the sludge from his thick mustache. "Well, I think these pipes are pretty much shot," observed Mario, scratching his head with his spanner. "It looks like we're going to have to redo the plumbing completely." "How humiliating," moaned Luigi, wringing out his green cap. "We've been top-notch plumbers for years, and yet we can't even fix our own plumbing." "It's not our fault," said Mario. "These pipes have served us well for a long time, but now they've finally given in. All things deteriorate in time." "Yeah, that goes for the rest of this house as well," said Luigi, as he and Mario left their tools on the basement floor and began ascending the stairs. "It's falling apart."

Upon emerging from the basement door, Mario instantly made tracks for the refrigerator. "Anything in particular you'd like for lunch?" he asked his younger brother, who was sitting down at the kitchen table. "What do we have?" asked Luigi. "Well, it looks like we've got some blue stuff and some green stuff," said Mario, examining the contents of the refrigerator. "I'd take the blue stuff if I were you, because there's a baby Wiggler crawling on the green stuff." "Time to go shopping again," observed Luigi. "Never mind. I'll just have some of that leftover pizza from last night." "Uh...are you sure you don't want some of this blue stuff?" asked Mario.
"No, I'll have the pizza," said Luigi.
"How about a roast beef sandwich?" suggested Mario.
"No, I'll have the pizza," repeated Luigi.
"I think we might have some egg salad in here if you'd like that," said Mario.
"No, I've said three times now that I want the pizza," said Luigi.
"Uh...well, that's going to be just a bit tricky," said Mario.
"Why?" asked Luigi.
"Because I finished it off last night," said Mario.

At this, Luigi abruptly stood up from his chair, his face turning red and his brow furrowing into a frown. "You ate my pizza?" he asked. "I didn't know you wanted it," said Mario.
"You ate my pizza?!" repeated Luigi, louder this time.
"Look, you know how I get in the middle of the night when I have that dream about the talking meatballs from Mars!" said Mario. "It always makes me hungry!"
"But you had to eat my pizza?!" growled Luigi.
"It was the only thing in the fridge besides a box of baking soda, an ice cube tray, and a lightbulb!" argued Mario.
"Well, that's your fault!" accused Luigi. "It was your turn to go to the grocery store!"
"No, it was your turn!" countered Mario. "I went last time!"
"I'm about to get very angry with you, Mario!" declared Luigi.
"Oh, so you want to fight?" asked Mario.
"Yeah, maybe I do want to fight!" said Luigi.
"All right, tough guy, bring it on!" pushed Mario.

And with that, the two enraged plumbers leapt at each other. They fell onto the floor and rolled back and forth across the kitchen, spinning like dervishes and trading blows like professional boxers. Every time it looked like one of them might get the upper hand, the tables turned and the other brother was on top of things. Thanks to their equal amount of experience in the world of turtle-trouncing and princess-saving, they were evenly matched. Finally, out of breath and out of adreneline, both Mario and Luigi broke away from each other and collapsed on opposite sides of the kitchen.

"Okay," gasped Mario, panting. "Truce?"
"Truce," agreed Luigi, equally breathless. Once they were able, Mario and Luigi got to their feet and stumbled to the middle of the kitchen where they met each other and shook hands. "It's good to have these fights every now and then," said Mario. "Clears the atmosphere." "That's what Oprah says," said Luigi. "Right," said Mario. "Of course, there's still the problem of our food shortage." "Never mind about the food," said Luigi. "Look at this over here."

Mario walked over to where Luigi was standing and looked down in the direction that he was pointing. What he saw was a horde of tiny insects crawling in and out of a hole in the wall. "Oh no," moaned Mario. "Termites. That's just what this house needs." "Not only that, but the support beams in the attic are buckling again," said Luigi. "Add that to the rotting walls, the faulty electricity, and the dead plumbing, and this house looks about ready to cave in. It's going to cost a fortune to fix."
"It would be cheaper to buy a brand new house," said Mario.
"But where?" asked Luigi. "The problem is, this is our ideal location. Especially since we're just within shouting distance from the castle."
"Yeah, that does allow us to jump in on the action early whenever Bowser decides to show up," said Mario. "Any place else would be too far away."
"Well, we can't live here for much longer, and that's for sure," said Luigi. The Mario brothers were pondering this predicament when a familiar voice sounded from outside. "Mail call!" shouted Parakarry, the Mushroom Kingdom's friendly neighborhood postal worker. "Well, that'll be a distraction anyway," said Mario, making his way to the front door. "With our luck, it'll be all bills," muttered Luigi.

Moments later, Mario came back inside, his arms full of multi-colored envelopes. "Looks like the usual trash," he said, dumping the mail in a heap on the kitchen table. Luigi picked up one of the envelopes and examined it. "According to this, we may already have won a million coins," he observed. "That's the sixth time this month," said Mario. "Throw it in the wastebasket." Luigi did so as Mario passed him more and more envelopes, all of which were doomed to meet the same fate at the bottom of the can. It wasn't until Mario had reached the bottom of the pile that something finally caught his eye. It was an elaborately decorated gold envelope with the words "Mushroom Kingdom Prize Patrol" emblazoned across the front. "Open that and see what it is," said Mario. Luigi took the envelope and slit it open, withdrawing a folded letter that displayed the following message:

Dear Sir/Madam,

The Mushroom Kingdom Prize Patrol is pleased to inform you that your household are the lucky winners in our random drawing contest. Your home address was randomly drawn as the grand prize winner in our Magnificent Mansion Give-Away! You are now the lucky owners of a luxurious, multi-level antique mansion! Enclosed in this envelope are a map and detailed directions on how to reach your mansion. Please stop by within the next 30 days in order to claim your new home. We hope to see you soon.

~ Mushroom Kingdom Prize Patrol

* * * * *

"Mirror, mirror, on the wall, how long until those plumbers fall?" the ghost asked the mirror.
The ghost didn't expect an answer. After all, the mirror wasn't magical. It was nothing but an ordinary mirror. The ghost would not allow anything in his realm to have a stronger supernatural presence than himself. But then, the ghost didn't need a mirror to tell him about his greatest enemies. He knew them all too well, having encountered them several times in the past, and never achieving the desired result. But now that elusive result was finally at hand. In short time, the Super Mario Brothers would meet their ultimate destruction. So pleasing was this thought to the ghost that he threw back his head and cackled loud enough to wake the dead. Literally.

This certainly wasn't what Mario had had in mind.
When he thought of mansions, he typically thought of long cobblestone driveways, golden fountains spewing champagne into Olympic-sized swimming pools, and alabaster statues placed strategically throughout the lush, green gardens. What he saw now was a dismal, foreboding-looking house surrounded by thick thorn bushes and deteriorating statues of angry gargoyles, and whatever the fountains were spewing, its glowing green hue betrayed the fact that it certainly wasn't champagne.
"Sheesh," said Mario to himself. "If we won, I'd hate to see what second prize looks like."
Still, a mansion was a mansion. Besides, Mario and Luigi were good at household maintenance. They'd soon have this place looking shipshape. He just hoped that Luigi wasn't dreaming of the same mansion that Mario himself had been picturing. Well, he'd be along a bit later to learn the truth soon enough.

Deciding to see if the mansion looked any better from the inside, Mario walked up the short driveway and opened the front door. The room was totally dark, and Mario fumbled around for a light switch. Finally laying his hands upon one, he flipped it and was relieved to see that the light worked, bathing what looked like the foyer in a golden glow of illumination. It was now that Mario could see the grand staircase, elegant chandiliers, and red carpet, all of which were aged and covered with dust and cobwebs, but still hinted that at one point in its history, the mansion had actually been quite a nice place to live. Maybe there was hope for this place yet.

Mario had just decided to ascend the grand staircase to check out the second floor when he suddenly felt the hairs that composed his mustache stand on end. After years of fighting the forces of evil, Mario knew that this was a conditioned response to imminent danger. He suddenly felt nervous. A chill wind blasted down the staircase and pushed Mario back against the far wall. The chandilier shook and dust flew everywhere as the wind continued to blast around the foyer like a hurricane. "What the heck...?" Mario began to ask no one in particular, but was cut off by a high-pitched, squealing cackle. Mario recognized the noise almost instantly and his mouth went dry. As suddenly as the wind had begun, it ceased, and Mario was not completely surprised to see a newcomer standing, or actually floating, in the middle of the foyer, blocking the door that Mario had entered through just minutes ago.

"Welcome to my nightmare, plumber," cackled the ghost with the crown on his head.
"King Boo," observed Mario. "Long time, no see. What have you been up to for the past couple of months?"
"Plotting revenge," answered King Boo, simply.
"Well, at least you've been using your time constructively," said Mario. "But I don't remember ever inviting you to my house." At this remark, King Boo cackled loud and long.
"That's the beauty of the whole scheme," he said. "This isn't your house. It's my house!"
"No, I think you must be mistaken," said Mario. "The Mushroom Kingdom Prize Patrol told me that I'd won this house."
"I am the Mushroom Kingdom Prize Patrol!" declared King Boo, laughing hysterically. "And now that you've received your prize, it's my turn to go for mine!"

Like a bolt out of the blue, the whole puzzle came together in Mario's mind. This was yet another of King Boo's twisted plots for revenge. Mario supposed that that made sense. After all, he couldn't remember ever entering in a random drawing contest anyway. "Ghost Squad #1, the faucet head is here!" shouted King Boo. "Make him feel at home!" Instantly, half a dozen Boos appeared from the walls and swooped down to support their leader. "Prepare for pain, plumber!" crowed King Boo. "So, you want to dance, eh?" asked Mario, rolling up his sleeves. "All right, boys! Let's see if we can make men out of you!"

Cackling in unison, the six Boos charged at Mario. Mario ducked to avoid being bitten on the neck, then came up in an uppercut, punching one of the Boos clear across the room. Mario thanked his lucky stars that, unlike some ghosts, Boos were at least semi-tangible, and were vulnerable to physical attacks. Otherwise, he'd be hopelessly out-classed. But Mario hadn't met a Boo yet that could get the best of him.

Performing an agile backflip through the air to get out of the midst of the Boos, Mario vaulted to the mezzanine, where he reached into his overalls pocket and produced a flickering red flower. Instantly, Mario's blue overalls turned white, and his red shirt and hat turned a bright orange. Extending and splaying his ten fingers, Mario aimed skillfully at the Boos and sent a large fireball flying towards them. The ghosts scattered, shrieking in anger.

"Stop it, you fools!" roared King Boo. "You're letting him get the upper hand! Neutralize him! Neutralize him!"
"Why do you listen to this clown anyway?" Mario asked the platoon of Boos. "You must have figured out by now that you'd all be much better off if you gave up the whole world domination thing and settled into peaceful civilian life."
"We're not after the world this time, plumber!" declared King Boo.
"Really?" asked Mario. "Well, that's news to me. In that case, what do you want?"
"Only you," answered King Boo. "You and your brother!"
"Oh, I see," said Mario. "It's just a simple case of vengeance and bad blood. Okay, let's make a deal. I'll pretend to be really scared and hurt, and you can go back to your cronies in the afterlife and tell them that you humiliated the great Mario. After that, you'll presumably be satisfied and leave me alone. Then everyone will be happy. How does that strike you?"
"Shut up!" roared King Boo. "Don't just float there, you useless ghosts! Get him!"

Eager to obey their master's command, the Boos swooped towards Mario once again. But Mario didn't even bother to move this time. Instead, he simply stayed rooted to the spot, and then lashed out against all six incoming ghosts when they drew close enough. The Boos were no match for Mario's fists of fury, and within seconds, all of them had been dispatched.

"So, why don't we just chalk this one up to experience and go our separate ways?" Mario suggested to King Boo, making a great show of brushing himself off.
"You won't be going anywhere, plumber!" declared King Boo.
"Come on, you can't be serious," said Mario. "Just how do you expect to beat me?"

As soon as Mario said this, a deafeningly loud cackling could be heard. Mario only had to wait seconds to discover that it was in fact the combined cackling of a much bigger throng of Boos. The plumber's eyes nearly popped out of their sockets as he watched what had to be at least three hundred Boos appear through the walls all around him. "Good answer," said Mario, slowly backing towards the wall. "Good answer."

The Princess's plumbing problem had taken longer than expected, mostly because Luigi kept forgetting various tools, due to his excitement about his new mansion, and had had to keep running back to the house several times for the necessities. The sun was just beginning to set by the time Luigi tightened the final washer, said good-bye to the Princess, and started on his way, following the map that had been enclosed in the envelope. However, now that Luigi was standing in the mansion's front garden, he was beginning to feel that it really hadn't been worth the anticipation.

Luigi was just about to enter the house when he heard a hoarse voice emenating from a nearby shrub.
"Psst! Hey! You!" hissed the voice.
"Who's there?" asked Luigi, looking in the direction of the shrub.

In answer, an odd-looking man poked his head out from behind the bush. The man was small, only about four feet tall, and was sporting a long white lab coat, a pair of thick glasses, and a most ridiculous haircut.

"Come here," said the strange little man, beckoning to Luigi.
"What can I do for you?" asked Luigi, obligingly.
"The real matter is, what I can do for you," said the little man. "Allow me to introduce myself. I am Professor Elvin Gadd. But you can call me Doc. All my friends do."
"Well, I'm Luigi," said Luigi.
"I know," said Professor Gadd. "I've seen your picture in the newspapers many times. You and your brother have quite a career of saving the world."
"Well, we do what we can," said Luigi. "Forgive me, but what was it you wanted?"
"The reason I drew your attention just now was to tell you that you're in dreadful danger," said Professor Gadd.
"Really?" asked Luigi, skeptically. "Would you mind telling me why?"
"I don't know if you've ever read about my work in the Mushroom Kingdom Science Journal, but I am one of the world's most renowned ghost hunters," said Professor Gadd. "I use various methods of finding locations that have high populations of ghosts, and then use certain other various methods to capture them for my studies."
"Sounds like an interesting career, but what does it have to do with me?" asked Luigi.
"This mansion has a high ghost population," said Professor Gadd. "I arrived here this morning, just in time to see something dreadful happen to your brother."
"My brother?" asked Luigi. "You mean Mario? Is he in trouble?"
"In more trouble than you can contemplate," said Professor Gadd. "The ghosts dwelling here are apparently of a hostile nature. From my hiding place, I watched them overwhelm and subdue your brother Mario. And while I couldn't hear everything that was said between them, the ghost who appeared to be the leader apparently tricked Mario into coming here so that he could capture him."

The pieces of the puzzle clicked together in Luigi's mind just as quickly as they had earlier in Mario's. This was a set-up. And Luigi had a sneaking suspicion that he knew who was behind it. "Can you describe the ghosts' leader to me?" asked Luigi. "Well, he was big and round and white and...oh yes, he was wearing a large crown on his head," said Professor Gadd. Luigi smacked his fist into his palm. A ghost wearing a crown? That could only be King Boo, leader of the pesky ghosts that had plagued the Mushroom Kingdom for years. This whole charade with the mansion must have been his latest plot for revenge.

"Well, if that's the story, I can't hang around out here all night," said Luigi, starting towards the mansion's front door. "I've got to get in there and help Mario."
"Wait a minute," said Professor Gadd, seizing Luigi by the collar and pulling him back. "There are hundreds of them in there. If you rush in unprepared, you'll meet the same fate that Mario did."
"Well, what do you suggest I do?" asked Luigi.
"I have just the thing for you," said Professor Gadd. With that, the Professor reached behind his shrub and produced a strange-looking machine, consisting of a cylindrical container and a hose.
"This is the Poltergust 3000," said Professor Gadd. "A wonderous machine I invented myself for the precise purpose of hunting ghosts."
"How does it work?" asked Luigi, staring at it.
"It's sort of like a vaccuum cleaner," explained Professor Gadd. "As a matter of fact, that's what I originally modified it from. You wear the container on your back like a backpack and brandish the hose as your weapon. Flick this switch here and you'll turn the machine on, starting up the suction. And with any luck, the ghosts will be sucked right up."
"And that actually works?" asked Luigi, skeptically.
"Hey, haven't you ever seen Ghostbusters?" asked Professor Gadd. "It worked for them, didn't it?"
"Well, it's better than nothing, I guess," said Luigi, hoisting the Poltergust 3000 onto his back. "Anything else?"
"Take this walkie-talkie so we can communicate, just in case you get in a bad scrape," said the Professor, handing Luigi the device. "And you might want this flashlight as well." Luigi pocketed the walkie-talkie and flashlight and took one more look at the ominous-looking mansion before walking towards the door.

Once inside, Luigi noticed that the lights were on in the foyer. That was probably Mario's work. And thanks to the light, it was quite plain that no one was in this room. But this was a big house. It would probably take all night to search it from top to bottom. Luigi didn't want to stay in here for that amount of time. He just wanted to find Mario, beat King Boo senseless, and get everything back to normal as soon as possible.

Luigi ascended the grand staircase and opened a door to emerge in a dark hallway. He quickly switched on the flashlight and shone it down the length of the hall. It looked empty. "I'm starting to feel like I'm in the wrong game," said Luigi. "It's beginning to look a lot like Resident Evil around here." Luigi walked to the end of the hall and opened the next door he arrived at. Upon opening it, he emerged in what must have been the ballroom. It looked as empty as the previous rooms he had explored, but as soon as he stepped over the threshold, a chill wind came out of nowhere and blew the door shut. Seconds later, he could hear a familiar cackling.

"Having a good time?" giggled King Boo, materializing in the center of the ballroom.
"Oh yeah," said Luigi. "I haven't had this much fun since my last root canal."
"I see that you have fallen into my trap, just like your stupid sibling," crowed King Boo, triumphantly. "Now I have both of the Super Mario Brothers in my clutches! And I...hey, what's that thing on your back?" At first, Luigi didn't know what the ghostly monarch was talking about. But then he remembered that he was strapped to Professor Gadd's Poltergust 3000. And that gave Luigi an idea.
"All right, Fang Face," said Luigi, brandishing the Poltergust's hose in front of himself like a rifle. "This little device has the power to suck that smug smile right off your face. So tell me where Mario is or you're history."
"Oh, so you want to know where Mario is, eh?" snickered King Boo. "Very well. I'll show him to you."

With that, King Boo floated over to a curtain-covered wall and pulled a cord. The curtain fell away to reveal a portrait hanging on the wall. But this was no ordinary portrait. Luigi was horrified to recognize his brother Mario trapped inside of the portrait itself, as if he were an animated painting.

"Mario!" exclaimed Luigi. "Is that you?"
"Well, it's certainly not the Mona Lisa!" snapped Mario. "That crazy ghost trapped me in here!"
"That's right!" cackled King Boo. "But I'm afraid that my art collection is still not complete. I still need a Luigi painting to go with my nice new Mario one!" With that, King Boo swooped at Luigi. Luigi dropped to the floor just in time to avoid the attack. King Boo flew over the plumber's head and floated to the other side of the ballroom.
"And once I have you both hanging on the wall with a frame wrapped around you, I'm going to auction you off to the highest bidder at the next Emissaries of Evil meeting!" added King Boo. "Who knows? By this time next week, you could be hanging up in King Bowser Koopa's castle! Ha ha ha!"
"That does it!" growled Luigi. "Have at thee!"

With that, Luigi switched on the Poltergust 3000. A powerful suction suddenly took hold of King Boo, who waved his small arms wildly, in an effort to break free. Finally, he did so, careening into the far wall.
"Good move!" cheered Mario. "Nail him again, bro!"
"That was a lucky shot!" growled King Boo. "You will not ensnare me with that device again!" With that, King Boo cackled one more time, and then disappeared. Luigi readied himself for a sneak attack from his enemy, but none came.
"Well, I guess I sure showed him," boasted Luigi, stylishly twirling the Poltergust's hose.

Just as Luigi had finished his sentence, something broke through the ceiling. It was something big, and Luigi was thrown off his feet by the force of the object hitting the floor. Looking up, he saw none other than King Bowser Koopa. A really, really big King Bowser Koopa. The turtle tyrant's head was cramped against what was left of the ballroom ceiling, and his body took up at least one half of the room.
"Now you die, plumber!" roared Bowser.
"You know, you seem a bit taller than usual," observed Luigi. "Have you been eating your Wheaties, or is it just a whole mess of Super Mushrooms?"
Bowser roared and swept his clawed hand at Luigi. The hand was so large that Luigi couldn't avoid it. Before he could blink, the green-clad plumber had been snatched off the floor, and then thrown through the air. He struck the far wall and collapsed in the corner, struggling to get his breath back. "I've had better days," sighed Luigi, picking himself up.

Bowser didn't give Luigi any breaks. Within seconds, a huge spiked ball materialized in his hand. Bellowing with maniacal laughter, Bowser threw the spiked ball at Luigi. Luigi somersaulted out of the way just in time to avoid being crushed. "Now, that's a new trick," observed Luigi. "I don't remember him ever doing that before." Luigi dodged another spiked ball, then ran for cover as Bowser breathed a jet of flame, setting fire to the walls and furnishings. "This is ridiculous," said Luigi. "How am I supposed to be able to fight this guy? This vaccuum isn't any help at all." But then, observing the spiked balls scattered around him, Luigi's resourceful mind realized that maybe the Professor's Poltergust 3000 might have some use in this situation after all.

Switching the vaccuum on and turning it to full suction power, Luigi aimed the hose at the nearest spiked ball. He was overjoyed to see that the vaccuum was powerful enough to suck the ball towards it. Within moments, the ball was stuck on the end of the hose. Luigi turned towards Bowser, smiling this time. "Here's steel in your eye, Horn Head!" crowed Luigi.

Luigi then switched the vaccuum to BLOW. Like a pebble from a slingshot, the spiked ball shot out of the vaccuum and struck Bowser directly in the face. Luigi had expected the attack to knock Bowser down, or maybe even render him unconscious. That was why he was so surprised when Bowser's head came off completely and hit the floor with a loud clang. The enormous body soon followed. Separated from the head, it could do nothing but uselessly crash to the floor.
"Well, what do you know?" muttered Luigi. "It was a robot."
"Yes, it was a robot!" snarled King Boo, emerging from the interior of the fallen body, where he had been all along. "One of the best robots I've ever created! And you ruined it, you unthinking fool!"
"I've had enough of looking at your ugly face," said Luigi, hoisting the Poltergust once again.
"No!" barked King Boo, backing away from the vaccuum. "You wouldn't!"
"Watch me!" replied Luigi, and turned on the vaccuum one more time. King Boo was caught in the suction almost immediately, and had no chance of getting away. Within moments, he was inside the vaccuum's container.
"Great job, Luigi!" praised Mario.
"Aw, it wasn't so bad," said Luigi. "I just..."
Luigi was interrupted by a beeping sound. At first, he didn't know what it was, but then he remembered that he still had Professor Gadd's walkie-talkie in his pocket. Withdrawing it from his overalls, Luigi switched it on.
"Any luck yet, Luigi?" asked the crackling voice of Professor Elvin Gadd.
"More than you know," said Luigi. "I've solved our little infestation problem and found Mario."
"Excellent!" said Professor Gadd. "Is he all right?"
"Well, I know this is going to sound weird, but he's...well, he's sort of inside a painting," said Luigi.
"Ah, that old trick," said Professor Gadd, knowingly. "Ghosts are notorious for trapping their victims inside of paintings."
"Can we get him out?" asked Luigi.
"Fortunately, being an experienced ghost hunter, I created a little failsafe just in case anything like that ever happened to me,"said Professor Gadd. "Bring him out here to the garden and we'll have him fixed up in no time."
"Thank goodness," said Mario. "I haven't been two-dimensional since the 16-bit era. I'm not used to it anymore. It's really making my stomach turn." Luigi smiled, grabbed the Mario portrait off the wall, and headed for the mansion's front door.

"This is one of my most complex inventions," said Professor Gadd, pointing to a large hunk of machinery. "Specially designed to reverse a ghost's portrait spell. Just put him in that slot there."
"I don't know, Doc," said Mario. "This doesn't look too good."
"Would you rather be trapped inside that portrait for the rest of your life?" asked Luigi. "It'll be over with in just a few moments."

With that, Luigi dropped the Mario portrait through the slot. The machine instantly came to life, filling the night air with horrible mechanical noises. Squeaks and squeals and gears grinding against gears. Finally, after exactly twenty-five seconds, a fully three-dimensional Mario shot out of the nozzle on the far end of the machine and landed in the damp grass. "Say, that really works!" said Luigi, impressed. "Are you okay, Mario?"
"No, but I'm sure the nausea will pass," said Mario. "Thanks, Luigi. I owe you one."
"You owe me ten, but who's counting?" said Luigi, smiling.
"And where's the troublemaker behind all this?" asked Professor Gadd.
"Oh, he's right in here," said Luigi, patting the Poltergust's containment unit. Mario looked at the container, then looked at the Professor's machine, then looked at the container again. A wicked smile slowly spread across his face. "Luigi, are you thinking what I'm thinking?" he asked.
"I think I am, Mario," said Luigi, also smiling. "Doc, does this thing go in reverse?"
"The machine?" asked Professor Gadd. "Oh yes, it certainly does. It can create portraits just as easily as it destroys them."
"In that case, let's make some art," said Luigi.

With that, Luigi opened up the vaccuum's containment unit and dumped his captured enemy inside the machine. The horrible mechanical noises filled the air once again, and twenty-five seconds later, a new object was ejected from the machine. It was a perfect portrait of King Boo.
"Well, I don't know art, but I know what I like," said Mario.
"I like the way that it captures the essence of both light and shadow," said Luigi, observing the new King Boo portrait.
"A fine use for an otherwise troublesome ghost," said Professor Gadd.
"Tell you what, Doc," said Mario. "You keep the picture. Compliments of the Super Mario Brothers."
"Why, thank you very much," said Professor Gadd, obviously moved. "I don't know if I mentioned this before, but I'm also a great collector of exotic artwork. This'll look wonderful over the mantlepiece."
"Here's your Poltergust back," said Luigi, unstrapping the vaccuum from his back and handing it to the Professor. "Thanks a lot for the help."
"Oh, it was nothing, really," said Professor Gadd. "Just another night in the exciting world of ghost hunting. But if you'll excuse me, I really must be going. My sensors have already picked up some powerful spectral activity in the heart of Bean Valley."
"Go give 'em heck, Doc," said Mario.

With one more wave to the Mario brothers, Professor Elvin Gadd swiftly packed up his machinery and headed off towards the horizon, where the sun was just beginning to rise again. The excitement over, Mario and Luigi turned back to the mansion. "You know, we could still make the most of this situation," said Mario. "With a little work, this could be just the house we're looking for." "I'm with you, Mario," concurred Luigi. "Besides, I've always wanted to live in a mansion."