 Episode 15!! I Hate It When I'm Walking Down the Street and... By TD Mak (formerly known as Sarah M.) |
Episode 15!! I Hate It When I'm Walking Down the Street and... By TD Mak (formerly known as Sarah M.) |
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| Top
Row: Mario, Luigi, Wario, Toad, Peach, Bowser, Kamek, Yoshi, Cranky, Mega Man Bottom Row: Bass, Dr. Wily, Jessie, James, Meowth, Stan, Cartman, Kyle, Kenny, TD Mak Not Pictured: Guy at Home, Guy in Audience, Ad Guy, Ad Guy #2 |
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Hello
and welcome everyone to the BOTVGH show of "I Hate It When I'm Walking
Down the Street and..."! With examples to you live from DK Island of
stuff
that just ruin your day when they happen. No one... I, er, THINK no one
was hurt during this production... heh... heh....
tries to pull down a big black square in front of a stage to make it
look
like it's on TV, but the hook's too high)
(standing
on tippy-toes and being no where NEAR the hook): Uh... I can't reach
this
thing. Could someone help me out here?!
,
the director ( ) comes down
off director's
chair and tries to reach it, but she's too short, also) All
right, whose bright idea was it to attach the thing to the ceiling? No
one can reach it!
Where's
someone who can get it down??
is brought in)
hops on Rush Coil and yanks on cord, but
then
crashes to the ground in a heap, pulling down the 'screen')
Owwwwww.......
as janitor ( )
cleans up the pile of metal on the floor that is )
(muttering):
I don't get no respect around here.....
Annnnd...
ACTION!
I said, ACTION!!!
HELLO!?!?!?!?!?!?! (Who
is at far right of stage by now, in loud whisper): Pssstt, Mario,
that's
your cue!
(Off stage)
What!? I'm not ready yet! Cranky, stop hitting me!... (we hear
someone get roughly shoved to the floor and
letting out a yell) I can't get into this costume!
Mario?
Yes? Mario,
we don't have costumes. Just get on stage and play your part!
Oh. (Walks onto stage)
Now see
people, don't you just hate it when this--(anvil falls on )
happens? Doesn't it just ruin your day?
 (meekly)
What you were saying about no one getting hurt.....
Janitor!!!!!
sweeps the pancake away)
I have a name, you know.
NEXT!!!!
(Offstage):
Kenny, it's your turn, idiot!
walks onto stage, then inexplicibly falls over, dead)
Yeah, I just hate it when I'm walking along and I die. It's horrible.
Happened
to me several times. (Shakes head.)
He's
one of the best actors I've ever seen!
(Walking on stage
and looking at ): Um, I don't
think he was acting.
(walking on stage): Oh my God! They killed Kenny!!
(also
walking on stage): You &%$#*!!!
HEY
YOU!!! GET OFF THE STAGE! YOU'RE NOT IN THIS!!
WHY
AM I TALKING IN CAPS!?!?!?!
Ah,
much better. Would you kids mind getting off the stage,
please?!
This wasn't in the script!
Yes it was.
No
it wasn't. Toad, show him the script!
(Also on
stage): But it's not in the show's script, it's in the episode's
script. (Holds up episode script)
You're
not supposed to have that! Just get off stage!
Aah, this sucks anyway. In fact, screw you, I'm going home.
,
and drag 's
body off stage)
Well, at least I didn't have to take care of that one.
OK
people, let's get on with it....
(looking
at script): Uh, Mega Man was supposed to do this part.
Wait,
I think I can do something about that. (
runs out of the room, and comes back with a piece of metal) There, see,
here's his arm. That should help.... or something.....
We
need a replacement.
Camera
person--
Cameraman (to be revealed later): Oh sure, be politically correct. All
righty, I think we're set.
Action!!
One thing I forgot to say: When she says that, GET ON STAGE!!!!!!!!
walks on stage when suddenly he explodes. After he does, spikes are
clearly
visible underneath.)
(To mysterious person offstage [play ominous
music here]): Get rid of those spikes, especially
considering
that the author just ruined the skit by saying that they're there.
I
hate when I'm just mindin' my own business and I blow up.
Next skit!
(walking on
stage): ....What's my line again?
I hate it
when everyone screws up like this. Argh... (goes over to
and retells him his part)
Since Mario
is currently a pancake, I'll say this for him: Cranky, your
memory's terrible.
Shut up
Jummm.... er, uh, you cheap excuse for Jumpman!
(Eyes
watery) No one gives me credit or attention, *sniff* no wuh-hu-hun!
(Starts crying)
(ignoring
him) Could you say that a little louder Toad, I can't hear you!
Guy in audience: So we know what happens, heh heh heh..... Since when
do we have an audience?
Since I
wrote one in here.
And since
when are people popping up at random?
Since I
wrote them in here.
(sighs)
Hey
you author, get off the stage!
D'oh. (sits
down)
Since when
do we have seats...... on second thought, don't answer that.
(Continues to tell his part)
Got it?!
Uhh... no.
But I better get good money for agreeing to do your newfangled
excuse for a comedy!
Right,
whatever.
Action!
stands there)
Cranky, fall down!
What?! Why should I fall down? You and your skits, why in my day we had
REAL shows, not these stupid hurt everyone and laugh......
Someone
get him off stage please.
The
fun part of this role!
goes on stage and beats up ,
then sweeps him off the floor)
Doesn't
anyone remember their part???
I
didn't know we were even doing a skit.
WHAT!!!!???
We
better call for a commercial break.
talking.....)
Now
this is called a "SCRIPT". You READ the SCRIPT and MEMORIZE the
lines......
Ad Guy #2: Hey you, don't point out the fine print! They're not supposed to see that! Now they have all the time in the world to read it instead of two seconds! Prepare
for trouble!
Make
it double!
To
protect the world from devastation!
To unite all--
(Poking
on the back while pointing backward) Um, quit the motto. We have more
important
things to worry about.
and turn around to see a
big,
ugly monster, and it looks hungry.)
and : AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
, ,
and )
I
hate it when I'm walking down the street when I get eaten by a big,
fat,
ugly monster. Throws me totally off schedule. (sighs)
Was
that even in the script?
I
thought you were just going over it!
Oh. Um, just a second.... (pulls out
script) Nope! Looks like it wasn't!
Oh well. They were good actors. More than I can say for *ahem* other
people.
(Glares offstage)
That's a wrap!
But
I never got to do anything!
I'm
not taking any more chances.
Are you
sure you would have wanted to?
Errr....
no.....
gets up and beats up , then
sweeps him off the stage)
There
were no cows to drop on him for saying that.
And
now, for the credits (Takes a deep breath): (How many people ever pay
attention
to this, anyway?) The special effects, like anvils and ugly monsters
were
done--
walks on stage)
Thank
you, thank you. If it weren't for me, this skit would've been really
crummy
and I demand all credit. Also, in case you're wondering, I was the
mysterious
person Toad was talking to when Bass exploded. I personally loved my
part.
It was real fun hurting people. (grins)
)
Well,
I, um, have to go, um, to call up Nintendo about a game-- yeah, that's
it. I know you all love me! Bye-bye! (Teleports away)
He
didn't even let me tell him that I never finished talking. Anyway, the
camera guy was Yoshi.
;) 's
boots go on screen)
's
voice: Thank you people--
's
voice: Um, you're not supposed to give a speech. Shut up and pick up
the
camera!
's
voice: Awwww....
's
boots march off the screen, and we see 's
face once more)
As
I was saying, Kamek did special effects, Yoshi was cameraman, Bowser
did
music and lighting......
Wait a sec, we
didn't have music and lighting! That's
what made it so easy! See, aren't I the greatest?
Whatever,
Bowser. Anyway, the producer was.....
Me!!
No....
You wrote the episode. The producer was....
Say.... Who
was the producer?
I was too
lazy to think up one.
Okay....
then we don't have a producer.... That's weird. Anyway,
I was manager, and, as you'll see, I definately had the most lines. I
know,
I'm special. Especially knowing all the corrections I had to make.....
(Glares AGAIN offstage)
All (innocently): Whaaat? (Sighs)
Lastly, Princess Peach Toadstool of the Mushroom Kingdom--
Gezundheit.
--directed
the thing, in case you couldn't tell. (Which I hope you did, after all,
it's only written straight out in the episode....)
Okay,
that was horrible. Oh well. G'night everybody!
Hey,
wait!
What?!
We're done, and you're not in this episode!
Yes
I am! I'm in the cast! And I'm also a main character (as you saw in the
awards)! Don't you know, every episode I have to try and take over
BOTVGH,
and then have my plan foiled by some stupid plot device just made up so
that that the bad guy can't win!!!!
Not
in this one you're not.
But--
Look,
the ending sign is coming up, so you have to shut up so that I can end
the episode!
And thank goodness for that!
.......Idiot. |
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