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Viewer Bio. Valentina


By Stanley The Bugman

Vital Stats
Race: Human
Sanity: A bit calmer than Booster, but just a criminal mastermind inside
Outstanding characteristic: Really wierd shape for a head
Likes: Birds, statues, being in charge
Dislikes: Mallow
Hangs out with: Dodo, Birdo, and some Beezos (I REFUSE to call them Shy Aways)
How do we know she's crazy: She has a freaking bird on her head

Valentina, fresh out a rocky relationship with some guy named Wario, finds her way into the Nimbus Kingdom castle. Along with her overwieght companion (read: slave) Dodo, the evening gown-wearing fiend locks the king and queen in the back room, then convinces the not-so-smart people of Nimbus that Dodo is actually the long-lost Prince Mallow and she is his caregiver. Using "Mallow" as her puppet, she manages to control the comings and goings in the kingdom. She moves into the royal bedroom, along with her birdbrained friends-Dodo, the androgynous Birdo/Birdetta, and a fleet of flying, fork-toting Shyguys. Valentina asks the local sculptor to capture her likeness in countless statues, and plays this annoying harp-type music throughout the halls of the castle.

All goes well until the REAL Mallow shows up and calls Valentina's bluff. A showdown ends with the king and queen's being freed from prison, Mallow's relaization that he is the princes of Nimbus Kingdom, his reunion with his folks, and Valentina's being carried away by Dodo after Mario and Princess Peach kick her feathers. Valentina whines about the flight on the way home, so Booster just gets sick of her and drops Valentina. She happens to land on the roof of a certain crazed train enthusiast, who is still pining for his lost princess. A sentimental word melts Valentina's icy heart and the two rush to get married. The newlyweds vacation on Yoshi's Island, where they meet that dumb dog Poochey, then get kidnapped by Kamek's toadies. But that's another story.

Thoughts from Jay
Another Bio on the more popular charcters from the ever great Super mario RPG. I like the part at the end, linking many mario games. Keep up the good work Bugman.