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Viewer Bio. Pauline


By Ramatis

Pauline's Stats:

Name: Pauline Burquitz (Just kidding on last name~_^)
Gender: Human;Female
Age: See the Princess Daisy Bio. But I'd guess 15 to 28.
Where She Lives: Brooklyn
Where she is now: Unknown;probably Brooklyn
Weight: No comment
Height: I'd guess...5 feet,4 inches
Has she forgiven Mario of whatever he did to hate him: Nope,and probably never
Did she ever lose her 6th Grade Math Book: 6 times in the Trash Compactor,14 times in the swimming pool.
How much money she had to pay for it: $6,873 and still lost it
Quote: "I've gotta get outta heah! This ain't safe for a 'goil!"

In 1981,a big fat hairy ape named Donkey Kong,now known as "Cranky" Kong had escaped from hiz Zoo cage. He rather hated it there,espeically the food and the Assistant Manager. So on a lonely dark night,he escaped with his wife,Pony Kong(Couldn't hink of much else) now called "Wrinkly" Kong and went into the big city.
Life was sweet,now. Donkey Kong had scared a coupla outta their apartment and they lived in it. 1 month later,they gave birth to Donkey Kong Jr.
While Pony Kong took good care of their newborn,Donkey lied on the couch and watched
TV. He was rather obsessed with it;and then came the day he saw a classic movie known as "King Kong". Donkey Kong taped the show and watched it everyday. King Kong soon became his idle. And he was going to be just like him. So he did everything King Kong did. Then he came to the part of kidnapping a girl. So the following day,he set out to get one.
Pauline,an average city girl just happened to walk by the apartment as soon as Donkey left. Where was she going? To the Pizza Parlor for a date with Mario,who was a carpenter at this time. She was head over heels on him,and she could hardly wait to see him.
Donkey's obsession with King Kong overcame him,and he grabbed Pauline and took her away. Pauline dropped her purse and all the contents from it.
By the time Pauline was 3 hours late for the date,Mario left the parlor and walked along the block,pouting.
His pouting came to a sudden stop when he discovered her purse. So Mario ran to Pauline's house and returned the purse,then looked for Pauline. 8 hours later,Mario heard a cry of help,and it was indeed Pauline,on top of a construction site with Donkey Kong right at her side.
Screams of "HELP!" and "Lemme go,ya 'joik!" were heard 400 feet above Mario.
So Mario did his duties,and resuced Pauline. And Pauline was ever so greatful for her life being saved.
Then Pauline relized that Mario broke into her security system and into her house just to return her purse,ruining the whole system. Mario soon switched jobs and became a plumber. And months before Pauline and Mario's wedding were painful. Mario seemed to be more obsessed with the toilet than Pauline! Then Pauline had to cook SPAGHETTI every night. She was tired of all of it. Not to mention Pauline was practically Mario's SLAVE every day. And the only time Mario talks it's always "When's dinner,honey?" and "What should we call our son,sweetheart?" Pauline screamed. A week before the wedding,Pauline broke up with him,and Mario was heartbroken.
The wedding was called off;and Pauline was never heard from again as far as games go.
Poor Donkey Kong suffered simular reactions. After hearing about Pauline,Pony Kong moved away,and wasn't heard from until 1995 in DKC2.
Pauline is best friends with Princess Daisy of Sarasaland. She could warp to the castle whenever she wanted to,but she still refuses to tell how.
And that,my friends,is how bad Mario is with females. Ack...Princess Toadstool is next in line! Get ready Peach!

See another bio of Pauline,Daisy,Princess,Toad,and Yoshi at:
Quote: "Sometimes you just gotta learn to give up,go home,and eat a banana."

Thoughts From Jay

Ack, weird bio. Pony Kong??? OK... Whats with Paulinesís accent??? I like where you link King Kong to Donkey Kong.