Election News for October 14th, 2001
Elyane: Election 2000 is finally over!
Edgar: It is??? THANK GOD! I AM SO OUT OF HERE!!! SANITY! SWEET SANITY!!!
(Edgar strips to his underwear and jumps out of a window)
Elyane: Um...ye...great. Well, anyway, the winner, out of 91 votes, is Bill the Extra Guy. And of course, his running mate Kamek. Heres how the votes turned out.
1. Fred the Spanyard and Waluigi from the Neglectocrats - 22 votes
2. Wart and Birdo from the Subconians - 16 votes
3. Bill the Extra Guy and Kamek from the Bill Moose Party- 29 votes
4. Dr. Donez and Shy Guy from the Viewer Party - 24 votes
Elyane: As you can see, it was a close race. The runners were neck and neck early on, but soon after it started Bill the Extra Guy gathered a large support of votes and no one was able to catch him, although Dr. Donez got the closest. Fred the Spanyard and Wart were trailing for most of the race, with Fred being in dead last. But a last minute boost of votes pushed Fred ahead of Wart, saving Fred at least some face. But who cares about the losers? Lets talk about our winner, Mr. Bill the Extra Guy. Lets go to him in the studio. Hey Bill! Congratulations!
Bill: Thanks Elyane.
Elyane: What's it feel like to be the new President of NC?
Bill: Well, since I have no idea what I'm suppose to do, pretty good. It feels great to be recognized for my greatness.
Elyane: How about the success of your Third Party, the Bill Moose Party.
Bill: Well, that just goes to show you that a large ammount of cash is more then enough to win a Presidency.
Elyane: Any words from your running mate, Kamek?
Bill: Kamek just wants to say that he's going to use this oppertunity to kick Jay around. He's been pissed ever since he lost NC Deathmatch #15 verses Magus.
Elyane: There you have it from the winner himself. Well, that's all from NC Election 2000. If we ever figure out what the President and Vice-President have to do around here, we'll let you know. From the News team, I'm Elyane, signing off.
Election News for July 24th, 2001
Edgar: Dr. Donez has just picked his running mate!
Elyane: That's right, only moments ago, Dr. Donez has finished going through dozens of e-mails to pick the Viewer Favorite for his running mate.
Edgar: And the winner is...lets go to Dr. Donez and find out.
Donez: Thanks. For my running mate for the, what is it now? A election of some kind? Anyway, I picked Shy Guy.
Elyane: There you have it! Wait...which Shy Guy? Arn't there hundred of them?
Edgar: Yeah, come on, Dr. Donez, give us the info.
Donez: You mean that I have to pick a specific Shy Guy? Sheesh, ok, I'll pick...(Donez looks through a crowd of Shy Guys)...that one!
(Shy Guy Number 261 looks back and forth, then points at himself)
Shy Guy #261: Um...me?
Donez: Yeah, you'll do.
Edgar: Um...ok...sure... Anyway, lets start the election!
Elyane: That's right, it's time to vote! This thing has gone on long enough anyway. Your choices are...
1. Fred the Spanyard and Waluigi from the Neglectocrats
2. Wart and Birdo from the Subconians
3. Bill the Extra Guy and Kamek from the Bill Moose Party
4. Dr. Donez and Shy Guy from the Viewer Party
Edgar: Please, e-mail Jay Resop with your vote. You know the drill by now. The voting will last until NC's 4th Birthday, which is on September 6th, 2001. It may last longer if we need more votes.
Elyane: Any votes for other parties besides those four will not be counted. No voting more then once. If you do vote for your candidates, only your first one will be counted. Good luck, and we'll talk to you next when all the votes are in.
Random responces from the Dr. Donez Running Mate Vote
I think Luigi should be Dr. Donez' running mate
Earthworm Jim- He's funny, he's popular, he's cool, he's everything a running mate should be(even though they're usually not... remember Al Bore?)
I think Dr. Donez's running mate should be Kirby because Kirby's a hero and he's smart. Kirby is definetly the best running mate in the Nintendo Universe!
Dr. Donez' running mate should be the second Shy Guy in SMB2. I think his name's Frank, but it might've been Sir Picklealot...
Earthworm Jim... reason? Um.... he's cool?
I think Luigi should be Dr.Donez's running mate. I mean, he should have won for the neglectocrats anyway! HE'S LUIGI!!!!!!!! & people like him, so that'll help Donez.
I think Dr. Donez's running mate should be Goombario, because it would be neat to have a peice of paper for a vice president!
Kirby should be it. beacause he's embarrased for not having pants. which is what a good vice president is like.
I nominate Captain Syrup as doctor Donez's running mate. Why? She is truly neglected. She is only a microscopic sprite, Nintendo dropped her for a ugly clown, and she has as much dough as Bill Gates!
Colin Powell. Surely you have a picture of him lying around somewhere, Jay.
I think it should be Shy Guy for more than 1 reason.
1. He's Cool! ShyGuy all the way!
2. His 1st appearance was in the same game as Dr. Donez.
3. His 1st appearance was in the same level as Dr. Donez.
4. In almost every level Dr. Donez was in, so was Shy guy.
Bob the Bartender. USE HIM FOR GOD SAKES!!!
I want Yoshi to run with Dr.Donez! YOSHI ALL THE WAY!!!!
It should be Mouser. He has a fan club(at least I think he still does), and he is a very popular NC. He is a very cool character as well.
Jay Resop (just kidding)
Dr Donez's running mate should by Shy Guy because they were both in the same game and, according to Dr. Donez, the same level. I'm sure they talked or something in Sub-Con, and they're probably close friends. Maybe they could rule NC!(or at least be president and vice president)
Doctor D's running mate should be Chompy the white chain chomp! or pommy from Bomberman64 2(why because the flint said so!)
i think it should be Chrono everyones favorite mute
I think Shy Guy should be Dr.Donez's running mate because even though he's in a lot of games, all he does is get killed. Goomba would be a good choice too.
Dr. Donez's partner should be Jay Respo's ghost
In the same manner that John Adams was elected as George Washington's VP, I choose Shy Guy as VP for Dr. Donez. After all, Shy Guy tied for second, you know.
I think Dr. Wily should be Donez's running mate.
I think Ross Perot should be Dr. Donez's running mate because, well, he's Ross Perot! He's got alot of money and he's never been in a Mario game, or any Nintendo game, or any video game for that matter. And no one voted for him in 92 or 96. He's ultra neglected!
Donez's running mate? Lakitu, is the man for the job...they both ride around on top of things, and not only is he a neglected character, but he's a character neglected by your site!! Who better?
boo he could force people to vote for them or else he well steal all there coins and stars. he he he he he hhheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!
I think Dr Donez's running mate should be Koopa Troopa because he could help shell out a winning election.
This is the great T. Brian. I think Dr. Donez's running mate should be King Dedede. Why? Because...
4.he carries a big hammer (bigger than Mario's)
5.he's a king, so he already has experience in ruling
6.he's taken on Kirby multiple times (that takes guts)
7.and most importantly, he's neglected (he went from the big end-of-the-game boss to a mini-boss in the third level)
So anyway, that's my choice. (and I'm not changing it)
This is T. Brian signing off!
Dr. Donez's running mate should be Jay Respo!!!!!
Luigi! Luigi! Luigi! Please pick Luigi! (Even though he was a running canadite) ~LuigiMario
I think DR Donez's running mate should be tryclide. Can't be much more neglected than that!
I think Dr.D's running mate should be Bowser. becuase they both want world domination.
A Fat Guy.........Lyed! Relly Dr. D.'s Mate is..........................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................Bomberman!
Who else? Rayman should be donez's running mate. thats because not many people have heard of rayman, & donez is new, so they make a perfect match!
I think Dr.Donez's running mate should be Poochie because he is cute and deserves to be his running mate.
I think Dr. Donez's running mate for NC president should be Mouser! Also I don;t know how to vote, show I'll just tell you I want Dr. D. to win!
Election News for May 27th, 2001
Elyane: Hey all, quick update before the elections start!
Edgar: We have just gotten word on the rest of the running mates for the election. For the Subconian Party, running with Wart will be Birdo! Reports say that Wart has picked Birdo because of the newfound popularity of the character since Mario Tennis has been released. Wart believes that Birdo will help him take home the NC Presidency.
Elyane: What does the NC President do, anyway? Does he have any powers?
Edgar: No one knows...
Elyane: Anyway, we also have word that Bill the Extra Guy has choosen Kamek to be the Vice President on his Bill Moose Ticket.
Edgar: We're here with BIll tonight to talk about this event. Hows the election going so far, Bill?
Bill: Great, Ed.
Edgar: Don't call me Ed. Do you mind me asking how much money you have, Bill?
Bill: A crap load, Ed.
Edgar: Don't call me Ed. Why did you choose Kamek as your running mate?
Bill: Well, he did get four votes in the Viewer Election. How can I lose, Ed?
Edgar: Don't call me Ed. Any final statements?
Bill: I deserve this Presidency! Fred is already Mascot for crying out loud! Dr. Donez has his own section! And Wart is the final boss in a big Mario game! I have nothing! Please vote for me!
Elyane: Thanks Bill. Dr. Donez on the other hand still doesn't seem to know what is going on. We're live with him now from his home in his Evil Lab of Doom. Dr. Donez?
Elyane: Have you chosen a running mate for the election yet, Dr. Donez?
Donez: A what for a what?
Edgar: It's hopeless.
Elyane: Alright then. Since Dr. Donez is the candidate for the Viewer Party, we might as well let the Viewers pick his running mate!
Edgar: That's right! Send an e-mail to Jay Resop titled "NC Election 2000" or something. In the letter, say who YOU think Dr. Donez's running mate should be and why. Whatever character has the most votes and the best reasoning will be made Dr. Donez's running mate! So go ahead! Write in!
Elyane: That's all for now. Check in soon for the final election, which will be some time in the summer!
Election News for April 11th, 2001
Elyane: Welcome back to the NC Election 2000 center.
Edgar: A lot has happened since the primaries, lets fill you in on all of the details.
Elyane: After a close race, Fred pulled ahead of Luigi to win the Neglectocrat nomination. Luigi was stunned at the loss. Here's what Luigi had to say at a recent press release.
"Luigi: I was shocked at hearing the results of the primary. I mean, come on, I'm Luigi! How could I possibly lose??? I was left out of Super Mario 64 for crying out loud! I didn't show up in Super MaRPGio untill the end! This is disgrase!!! (Sob)"
Edgar: Sounds like Luigi took it pretty hard.
Eylane: Yeah, but Fred seems to be moving forward in his campain. He is currently on a tour around the world, trying to get votes from all over."
Edgar: This just in! Word has is that Fred has choosen his running mate for the election. And this person is...Waluigi! This comes as a surprize after Fred made fun of Waluigi's name at the last Neglectocrat's debate.
Elyane: All Waluigi has said so far on the election is "I'm-a-Waluigi, I'm-a-gonna win!" Here's what Fred said in a recent speech.
"Fred: Yeah, I really like that new guy, Wa-(Hey, whats his name again? Oh yeah, thanks)-Waluigi. (Although I still think he has a stupid name). Waluigi is a real life symbol of Neglectedness. But enough about that. Who wants some money!?!?!"
Edgar: The other candidates have not yet announced who their running mates are.
Elyane: Bill seems to be pretty relaxed during the campain so far. Word is out that he is currently on vacation in Hawii to celebrate his nomination in the Bill Moose Party.
Edgar: But...he was the only candidate. Of course he won!
Elyane: Anyway, Wart has also been traveling around the world to gather support for the Sub-conian cause. Word has it that Wart is trying to push his new game, Super Mario Bros. 2 2. He says that he will use it as his first step to advancing more Neglected beliefs after he is elected.
Edgar: We also have new news on Dr. Donez's reaction on being nominated by the Viewer Party. Here's what Dr. Donez had to say.
"Dr. Donez: I won what?"
Elyane: Dr. Donez doesn't really seem to know what's going on yet, apparently the nomination caught him by surprize. We think he'll figure it out soon though, he has a PhD after all.
Edgar: Thats all the news for now. Expect a big debate soon, along with the other candidates announcing their running mates.
Election News for March 29th, 2001
Edgar: Here we are, the election results from the NC Election 2000 Primaries!
Elyane: We'd like to thank everyone who cast their vote, all 80 of them. And the winners are...Fred the Spanyard from the Neglected Party, Wart from the Sub-con Party, Bill the Extra Guy from the Bill Moose Party, and Dr. Donez from the Viewer Party! A very close election, here are all of the results.
Fred the Spanyard-Winner!-32 votes
Stanley the Bugman-5 votes
Cletus Washington, the Goomba-5 votes
Phone the Clone-25 votes
Bill Moose Party
Bill the Extra Guy-Winner!
The Viewer Party
Dr. Donez-Winner!-5 votes
Shy Guy-4 votes
Bart Simpson-1 vote
Jay Resup-1 vote
A Guy Named Bob-1 vote
Pat Buchannon-1 vote
Mumbo Jumbo-1 vote
Earthworm Jim-1 vote
Paper Boy-1 vote
Samus Aran-1 vote
Dekar from Lufia 2-1 vote
Koopa Jr-1 vote
Digital Mario-1 vote
Mega Man-1 vote
Jackal Lord-1 vote
Edgar: Very close elections indeed. So that means, that when the final NC Election starts, the four candidates to choose from will be Fred, Bill, Wart and Dr. Donez. This should be one heck of a race.
Elyane: Thats all for now, we'll have more on the election soon. We'll bring you speeches from all of the candidates, plus the aftermath of the NC Election Primary. Stay tuned, the final NC Election will start soon!
Election News for March 1st, 2001
Edgar: Holy crap! What the heck happened?
Elyane: We got screwed up because of the server. But before then the election was going great. So far we have 50 votes in.
Edgar: Because we know we can get more votes then that, we are going to continue to hold the election primaries until March 21st, 2001. Thats about twenty days away.
Elyane: After that we'll tally up all the votes, post who won in each party, and then get ready for the final NC Election 2000. So if you havn't voted yet, please send in your votes! Edgar: If you got an e-mail from Jay confirming your vote, please do not vote again, its already been tallied.
Elyane: Happy voting and we'll see you on March 21st!
Election News for January 21st, 2001
Elyane: Welcome back to Campain 2000!
Edgar: We have new election news for you, three, count them, three new characters have entered the race at the last minute.
Elyane: For the Neglectocrats, after much debate, Luigi has finnaly joined the race for NC President! Lets here a speech Luigi made after the decision.
"Luigi: Well, why not?"
Elyane: Thats all Luigi said during that speech.
Edgar: For the Sub-con Party, running against Wart and Mouser will be Phone the Clone. This is a surprizing announcement, since Phone has been in the shadows of NC since The Mushroom Wars. When asked about where he stands on the issues. He simply stated "Death to all non-clones!"
Elyane: Finally, the most shocking announcement of them all, was when Bill the Extra Guy started his OWN party, called the Bill Moose Party. Bill will be running alone for this party this year, since it IS his party.
Edgar: Rumor has it that Bill founded this party using all the extra money he's saved over the years for endorsing Super Mario Bros. 2. He has a shoe ad in Germany.
Edgar: Well, its the new year, so that means the election will be right around the corner. When will the election be, Jay?
Jay Resop: The primaries for the official NC Election will start today, on January 21th, 2001. Please e-mail me, Jay Resop, with your vote for each party. Please, only ONE vote for each party or your vote will be thrown out. In case you forgot, here are the official candidates for each party. Along with your three party choices, you can choose ONE write-in vote. This can be anyone in the Video Game universe not in the elections so far. The character (or characters) who get the most write-in votes will run under the Viewer Party.
The NC Election Primaries
Fred the Spanyard
Stanley the Bugman
Cletus Washington, the Goomba
Phone the Clone
Bill Moose Party
Bill the Extra Guy
Jay: The primary election will end one month from the start day, Febuary 21th, 2001. So to say that again, e-mail me, Jay Resop with the subject title "NC Election 2000" with the following:
1. Your ONE vote for the Neglectocrats
2. Your ONE vote for the Subconians
3. Your ONE vote for the Bill Moose Party (Bill, duh) and
4. Your ONE write-in vote
5. Any other comments about the election or the site.
The winner of each party (Neglectocrat, Subconian, Bill Moose, and Viewer) will run in the final election to come later. Happy voting!
Election News for August 20th, 2000
Edgar: Well, after a long summer heres your NC Election 2000 update.
Elayne: Two new candidates have entered the running!
Edgar: From the Neglectocrats, we have...Stanley the Bugman?
Elayne: Many of our viewers may not know that he was from Donkey Kong 3, replacing Mario.
Edgar: Wow, that's neglected.
Elayne: Stanley was unavailable to make a statement about his running.
Edgar: And we also have word that Wart finnaly has an opponent for the Subconian ticket-Mouser!
Elayne: We have Mouser with us right now talk about the election. Welcome, Mouser.
Mouser: It's great to be here Elyane.
Elayne: So tell us what made you decided to run for the NC election.
Mouser: Frankly, I was board. I havn't been working for years. I was tired of watching old reruns on TV sitting at home by myself eating nothing but toothpaste. I wanted to reach out to the community, do something with my life, do something with my li...
Edgar: This is only an hour show.
Elayne: Anyway, what made you run for the Sub-con Party?
Mouser: Well I WAS in Super Mario Bros. 2. Plus that hot-shot Wart needs to be put in his place.
Edgar: Any final comments for the viewers?
Mouser: Sure, vote for me, 'cus I'm cool. These shades arn't for increasing my vision.
Elayne: Thanks, Mouser. Now we go to Chicago, where Fred and Toad are in the middle of a debate.
Edgar: Cletus Washington was not able to attend for unknown reasons. Now to debate.
Person in charge: Mr. Spanyard...
Fred: Just call me Fred, please.
Person in charge: OK...Fred, what would be your first action once taking the office of NC President?
Fred: I would give everyone a million dollars
Toad: What kind of action is that??? You don't have the power to give everyone a million dollars!
Fred: It looks like Toad doesn't care for the people, who I love.
Toad: What? I donate thousands of dollars every year to STAMP, Save The Aged Mushroom Poor. I give presents to all the sick little mushrooms in the hospital at christmas. Not to mention helping Mario out whenever his butt's in trouble.
Fred: And yet you don't care enough to give everyone a million dollars. Tsk tsk. Is this a person you want to be president?
Person in charge: Thats enough babble you two. Next question. Toad, what is your opinion on the "new" negelected character, Waluigi?
Toad: I think he will be a fine addition to our cast and will be able to futhur advance the plotlines of Mario games.
Person in charge: Fred?
Fred: I think he has a stupid name.
Person in charge: OK, next question. Fred, what is your plan for site defence, against possible invation from the enemy websites that are Pro-Mario.
Fred: I'll just wipe them out of existance using my Ray of Death, Death Ray and my new attack that I have been working on, The Deathly Death Ray of Deathness.
Person in charge: And...
(Cletus comes in, covered in wiped cream)
Cletus: I say someone destoryed my car! That be why I'm late!
Person in charge: Then why are you covered with wiped cream?
Cletus: It was done by the same person! To make me look like an idiot on TV!
(Fred looks up in the air, looks innocent, and whistles)
Cletus: But I won't give in, I'm still in this race! Vote for me!
Elayne: Thats all we have from the debate right now.
Edgar: We have word comming in that Luigi is right now with a group of advisors concidering to run under the Negelected Party ticket. He has not made a final decision right now, but if he joined in, it would most certinly throw the Neglected Party into choas.
Elayne: Arn't they already in choas?
Edgar: True. Wait. Hold on, this just in. Upon hearing of Mouser's decision, Wart has started some massive campaining. Here he is now in Idaho with a speech. Lets here what he has to say.
"Wart: My fellow characters, gamers and freaks. I am here now to tell you about our great Subconian campain and what I will do to make Neglected Characterism better for all. The Sub-con Party platform is all about getting those old one-time characters, like myself (sniff), back into the new games. If I am elected President, I will strive to work for a Super Mario Bros. 2 2. It'll have a better title then that, trust me. We will see Kuribo's Shoe in another game if I am elected. And yes, we will see a game staring Luigi that isn't as crappy as Mario is Missing. As the main boss of Super Mario Bros 2, and one of the most neglected bosses in video game history, I have first hand experience with negelctedness. So vote Wart! Thank you."
Edgar: Thats all we have time for today. We'll see you again soon with another update on the ever exciting NC Election 2000!
Election News for May 16th, 2000
Elayne: Here we are with your current NC Election news!
Edgar: Its been a while, but a lot has happened in the elections!
Elayne: We just have word that there is a new candidate running for the Neglected Party.
Edgar: His name is Cletus Washington and he hails from Alabama, USA. We now go to Jeff Socks live at Alabama where Cletus has made the announcement. Jeff?
Jeff: I hear you Edgar, its been wild here all week. People rush from all around to see hick-gone-famous Cletus Washington. Cletus, a goomba related to George Washington, just announced his canidincy for NC Election 2000. He decided to run for the Neglected Party since nobody has really heard of him. When asked if he was running because he was related to George Washington he answered "Sweet sassy malassey, no! Ah had no ider Ah wuz related ter Washin'ton 'till that guy told meh. I is runnin' 'cause I want liberty fer all goombas." Since Washington's sign-up in North Carolina, there has been rumors of Bowser starting Villians United, a party based in Virginia. When asked about the matter, Bowser replied "No comment." Back to you.
Edgar: Wow, this election is really heating up. Do you think that Bowser will really join in this election?
Elayne: I don't know, but right now anything is possible.
Edgar: We also have an update on Fred the Spanyard's campain. Right now he's in New York trying to get some support there, a largly Subconian state. Here is a speech recorded earlier today.
"I know that if you vote for me, I will help you. I have been on David Letterman, Jay Leno, and Conan O'Brien. I feel that this greatly boosts the votes I will get. The people who are messing up our country are the other canidates. Yes, espicially the Libertarian, Socialist, Natural Law, and Reform parties. Man, those guys are crazy. Ya, and those other parties are nuts too. But anyway, here's David Letterman's Top 10 Reasons to Vote for me:
10. He has a face like a lobster.
9. He can throw you (remeber Kirby's Adventure?).
8. He has super-sonic hearing (those big ears).
7. He's neglected.
6. He has a cool ray of death.
5. His name is Fred.
4. He has no relitives.
3. Fred loves you.
2. He has his own cartoon.
1. He's a Spanyard.
See? Even Letterman supports me. And also, by voting for me, you get 1000 bucks! Yes, when in the voting booth, and you put your ballot in the slot thingy, you get 1000 dollars! Also, if you subscribe to Fred for Prez Magazine, you get a Fred the Spanyard Action Figure©, and a free bunny! Now, go out and Vote for Fred! ˇMuchos Gracias!"
Elayne: I don't see how any other candidate has a chance now. Fred is really turning out the voters.
Edgar: Don't decide on the winner quite yet, Elayne, word has it that Toad is touring Europe right now to try to get in touch with the people there. We should here of a speech from him in a few days.
Elayne: But what happened to Wart? Is anyone else going to run for the Sub-con Party?
Edgar: Right now it looks like Wart has a free ride. But he is starting to look support with the Consrevative Subconians in Asia. He is currently on tour in Russia.
Elayne: Well, thats it for now at NC Election Central. More updates on this exciting election will come as they develop.
Election News for March 6th, 2000
Edgar: Hi everyone this is Edgar de Montegue de Monholyes de Mandarb de Mandragoran.
Elayne: And I'm Elayne Jahovavitch. We're going to be broadcasting to you live every moment of this exciting election!
Edgar: Lots of exciting stuff has happened so far in the few short weeks the election has begun. Elayne: Already we have two candidates ready for action. Fred from the Neglectocrats and Wart from the Subconians.
Edgar: But wait Elayne, word is out that another character is now running for the Neglected Party, none other then Toad himself!
Elayne: Wow, this fight is already starting to heat up. I think soon Fred will be ready to have a debate with his new competitor.
Edgar: Wart shouldn't feel lonely however. I'm sure some more characters will start running for the Sub-Con Party any day now. All they need to do is gather up a little bit of support and money.
Elayne: More to come on the elections soon. Thats all for now from the NC Elections 2000 Center.
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